I'm way kick ass now. I eat sensibly, exercise... That's me in the hot chef's jacket, though I have no formal training as a cook. The occasion was the other night and I was preparing dinner for my wife of 14 years, as I recall, and that's the sort of massive tool I've become. Also I've included a picture of my underwear hanging on a line in Central America. I would put up more pictures of me, gazing into the camera in various stages of undress, but apparently we're each allowed only two, and I think the underwear picture is important.

But what about you? I'm sure you can't wait to hear... I wrote an unpublishable novel, moved to Russia. Presently I spend my days negotiating endless seas of free time, and drinking in the afternoon. Let's get together!